Divorce can be looked upon objectively or subjectively. In its objective point of view, it is the dissolution of a marriage. But looked upon subjectively, it is a painful event and a liberation. You can look at divorce subjectively as you noticed in two ways – either in a positive or negative manner. To help you move forward, you must look at your divorce in a different light. Look at everything positively. It can only get better from here.
So why should you want to think positive even after that painful divorce? Well, positive thinking in itself is a good thing. But as a newly liberated woman, it is important to think positively after your divorce because of several benefits you can enjoy.
For one, thinking negatively of life after divorce brings about stress. What you think of translates physically. When you are constantly thinking of unhealthy thoughts, these thoughts are manifested in your body – your health. Your stress level will rise and these can lead to your blood pressure shooting up. Your heart rate will decrease and symptoms of depression can appear. In contrast, positive thinking will do you wonders. It can give you a sense of peace that will also translate physically. Indeed, don’t be surprised if other people say that you are positively glowing.
Second, positive thinking opens you up to whole new possibilities. With your sunny thoughts and positive outlook to your life after divorce, you are not closing yourself off to the world. You are not limiting yourself to holing up at your house and watching sad movies. Positive thinking gives you an added strength to go out there and live the life you deserve. You are becoming vulnerable. You are open to new experiences. You don’t let one bad experience define the rest of your life.
Now that you’ve seen some of the benefits of positive thinking, how do you achieve positive thinking to life after divorce?
After the divorce process, do not ever feel guilty of thinking about yourself. You are entitled to thinking about yourself. This is the backbone of your quest to positive thinking with life after divorce.
One, acknowledge your marriage and its dissolution. Not so you can “get on with life already”, but because this gives you a clear closure and in that way, you can move on freely.
Second, create a positive vibe.
You can create this positive vibe by surrounding yourself with anything wonderful and positive. Start at your home. Spruce up your home with lovely colors (avoid dark gloomy ones) and add some plants or if you want, start a garden. Having plants allows you to grow and take care of something as you take care of yourself. If the plants grow, it shows that you have made the effort and you are in turn getting back on track. Also, make sure that you have a very positive support system. Some people tend to throw their problems at you the very chance they get. Steer clear from these people for the meantime. Remember, put yourself first. Also, creative a positive vibe includes pampering yourself. Give yourself a new wardrobe, a massage, some aromatherapy as long you want. Surround yourself with flowers, watch funny movies, listen to upbeat songs – this will all help you realize there is so much more to life than sadness and anger. This is a healthy and positive environment.
Third, create your own mantra.
It may be “there is life after divorce” or it could be along the areas of “I am beautiful, worthy, and such”. Repeat this everyday, especially when you feel a little down. Repeat your attributes and strengths. This gives you power as a woman and as an individual. Divorce did not take your attributes away. Having a mantra strengthens your resolve and your positive thinking to life after divorce.
There are still a lot of things you can do to achieve positive thinking. Think of the things that you’ve always wanted to do – but had to cancel because of some constrictions you had during your marriage. You can do all these things now – no one is holding you back. Thinking of these alone is already positive thinking. Positive thinking may take time and some getting used to – but it definitely is worth it.
