Maybe you knew those papers were coming, and prepared yourself for that knock on the door where a stranger stands before you with papers stating your spouse wants out.
Or maybe you didn’t know and fell apart in front of that process server.
Even if you welcome the idea of divorce, this might be one of the hardest situations you’ll ever be asked to survive.
Yes, survive. You can survive the divorce process, even if it gets uglier than a television talk show episode
You will grow as a person and get to meet yourself in ways which you never knew possible. But during any change, you will need to draw upon your inner strength. Some of us have a lot of untapped inner strength that we never before accessed. Whether you’re a soon-to-be ex-housewife or a corporate magnate, you might need some or all of these following tips to find inner strength during the divorce process. Here is my divorce advice to you…
Divorce Support To Get You Through:
1. You don’t have to go through this transition alone. Tell yourself if necessary that, “I am not alone.” There’s nothing wrong with asking for help, even if you’re the type who never even asks for travel directions. If you aren’t comfortable talking to a family member or friend, you may consider hiring a professional therapist or life coach. If you’re in deep mourning and want to vent a lot about the divorce, you’re probably best suited to a therapist. If you’re somewhat glad your divorce process is underway but not quite sure what to do next, a life coach might be able to help you outline steps to move forward in your life. You might be able to start a career, find a new career, go back to school, travel, or all of the above. But how will you really meet your true self—sans spouse—if you go it alone?
2. Sit quietly with yourself on a daily basis, even if just for a few minutes. You don’t have to believe in prayer, meditation, yoga, or some New Age philosophy to sit quietly. Just lie down or sit down and have a couple of moments of solitude. We’re all so busy, and the divorce process can require a lot more time and energy than we feel we actually have inside of us. Quiet reflection can fuel those reserves of inner strength, and you might even get some ideas of your next life step (like taking a trip.)
3. Try to keep your thoughts and words as positive as possible. This doesn’t mean you have to qualify for sainthood. But if you’re constantly thinking curse words about your soon-to-be ex, or trashing her to everyone who will listen, you’re feeding yourself negative energy. Positive thoughts can be difficult to find during such challenging times. But if you think of at least one thing each day for which you are grateful, then that attitude of gratitude can carry you through even a difficult court hearing. Try to think of positive things that aren’t related to your ex, perhaps something as simple as a sunny day or a dog’s sleeping gaze.
Above all, know that keeping these three pieces of divorce advice in mind you can and will survive the divorce process and likely become a new and improved person with limitless potential.
